:BAD TRIM:


When I first met one of my friends it was at a underwear house party in freshers. He was the only one fully clothed and he looked like he was having a bad trip on acid. I asked him many times if he was ok but it seems my neon stripey nu-rave hot pants weren't really helping anything and he was shy and I was shockingly loud and annoying and under-dressed. The whole combination of everything was just a bad time to take acid frankly. ANYWAY, we became good mateys and I remember once seeing him with a saucepan on his head cutting around it with blunt scissors. It was so bad but these are the things my boy mates had to do if they wanted to avoid me cutting their hair. 

What I'm trying to say is boys shouldn't care about their hair that much.Be more like my fishermans friend instead of this fuming London boy below who does a good impression of Tempz. Your boys, go play in mud or something. This guy below in particular has been done wrong though. You do not want to see a south-east London boy get a bad trim. This is funny.

:SOMEONE WAS BOUND TO DO THIS:CYBER LOVE:


I always knew there would be some crazy bitch who would one day fulfill Vanessa Carltons song of A Thousand Miles and abandon all dignity, self-respect and sanity. Just didn't think they'd commit robbery at the start of their romantic journey, guess that makes it all a bit more romantic. But what do I know, I'm overly pleased with a pack of kitten stickers.
You know who would be proud of this act though? Latrell. 


Just tried to google how many times you would have to play said song in your car on repeat before you actually reach 1000 miles but my laptop wouldn't allow such a lame search and broke down on me. But I reckon it's long enough that when you finally get out of the car you'll probably take an axe to the persons head and keep it as a cushion so that you know you'll never have to drive again/until your next dose of PMS.

I've got back into Simpsons again recently. I think it's embedded in every young persons brain that Simpsons is on at 6pm. Fuck the news. Who needs news when you can have images like this projected into your mind. Nights of the hidden Unicorns or what.

Definitely my favorite tune at the moment


ITS GETTING HOT IN HERE, SO TAKE OFF ALL YOUR CLOTHES

:NEEDLES & NAILS: CHANNEL U: IMPERIAL SQUAD:

Valentine Lane down at Needles and Nails did some Al Bandana print on me. In the space of time given I managed to talk about weave, eye lash extensions, the price of weave, Iggy Azalea, Housewives of New Jersey, Love and Hip Hop, who's a bitch, southern rap, black clothes and Imperial Squad. 
So if your in the south coast (of England) and your feeling like your up for some pain and patterns then go get a tear drop tattoo on your face for your dead homie while getting some hello kitty nail art on your middle finger and I can bet you'll walk out feeling like a boss. 

OH and if your down then how about indulging your inner rude boy and taking yourself back in the day to this beaut. Channel U days, when having a free house was so important. If you grew up in a place that had a lot of open spaces and breathable air, I'm afraid you may not appreciate this. 
Thanks Chani for the 90s hook up. x


:STYLE IS THE ANSWER TO EVERYTHING: PEGGS AND SON:


The guys at Peggs and Son have put together some snazzy outfits for everyone to appreciate showing that they truly know their fashion and how to put a good look together effortlessly. Check out their new style page which is particularly handy for men who have trouble putting their outfits together. Also featured is a break down of individual items so you can fish out the bits you like most. Peggs are also currently stocking Raised by Wolves which is a favorite of mine. If you appreciate brands such as Folk, Norse Projects, Obey and Maiden Noir, or you live in East/South London and know more than 5 graphic designers then check out the brand because you will like it. 




:NEW MAJOR LAZER MUSIC VIDEO: BUBBLE BUTT: 2CHAINZ: BRUNO MARS: TYGA: MYSTIC:


The new music video for Major Lazer's Bubble Butt is out and it's the remix bitch feat. Bruno Mars, 2Chainz, Tyga & Msystic and it's pretty clear to say 2013 is the year of the ass. 
Both donkeys and bum cheeks unite. 


When I saw the first image below I was like wow cool I love purple stuff and I love those glasses and those pastel wigs and the mesh clothes and the 90's furniture and literally everything but then I was like WOAH shut up Alice, this video is definitely taking the piss out of these people so stop liking it because it's not cool anymore. I'm joking purple is forever and so are round glasses but anyway, these hipster girls get given the best present a white girl could ever be given, and that is....


The whole video is pretty much about the twerk voodoo lady who gives these tumblr hipsters some twerk worthy asses. The rest of the video just consists of various other cool looking girls with big thangs. Whether your watching this video for the music, for the fashion or for the twerking your going to be pleased. If like me you enjoy all 3 things then watch this and be satisfied. 



:GAMES OF THRONES: IN THE 90'S:


Here are some illustrations of Game Of Thrones Characters if they were around in the 90's instead of old made up times. Done by tumblr artist Moshi-Kun.




:AGONY AUNT: 2CHAINZ:


All couples argue whether it's about trust, money problems or candy crush, and when that time dawns once a month everyone needs a helping hand. Who better than 2Chainz to be your agony aunt. Sit down with a cup of hot cocoa and come listen to 2Chainz'z honest advice. 

:NEW ACE HOOD: ROOT OF EVIL:

:DESIGNER DRUGS: JONATHAN PAUL:


Jonathan Paul aka Desire Obtain Cherish has recently released his latest works Designer Drugs. Made out of resin casted acrylic; these sculpture show the latest trends combined together by way of fashion and drugs. 



:NEW WORK REMIX: A$AP FERG: A$AP ROCKY: FRENCH MONTANA: TRINIDAD JAMES : SCHOOLBOY Q:


I'm all like yeahhhh lets what this new music video before I go to bed and blog it really early. And American Rights and YouTube were all like Nahhhhhh your not because you don't live in this country and blah blah blah but anyway it's out now so there's no use crying over spilt milk. And I've got a sneaking suspicion I fancy French Montana but it's ok.

past present and future



New front cover of Clash Magazine designed by the Creator himself.


:BLACK MILK: SYNTH OR SOUL:


I've just realised I've been listening to Black Milk's new Synth or Soul album for the entire day. I've had my breakfast to it, I've walked into town and done my shopping to it and now I'm going to cook my dinner to it, (yes that's right my life revolves around food.) But what I can conclude from time spent that this is a feel good album with the daily intake of beats one needs in ones life. Compliments to the chef.

Synth or Soul is the first instrumental installment of Milk's visual art and sound series called Fuzz, Freqs & Colours aka FFC, which is a collab project with artist Upendo "Pen" Taylor. Check out Upendo's work and like a true art historian, you'll understand how important music is to art and vice versa. This album is unhurried and hand crafted like a Lindt bunny and when Milk humbly released this into the world it received a speedy response with the selling out of the limited edition LP's.

Milk's managed to create a whole ecosystem out of twelve tracks with a huge diversity of sounds and carefully chosen samples. Each track is different from the next but they still manage to blend seamlessly without having to skip a track or adjust volume. A treat for the ears is what I'd call it. You can tell Milk makes music to endure and trigger different senses of the mind and I'd love to hear some vocals coated on top in the near future. It's almost as if Milk and Dilla have done a back to back album by way of some spiritual black hole in the atmosphere. The presence of Dilla in this album is undeniable and a beautiful way of   Milk paying homage and making it his own.



The track names given also seem incredibly fitting when you put your mind to it. Each song is like a different fragment of Milk's mind and takes on its own character and vibe. Track one named Computer Ugly Ugly starts off with some seedy sounding keys which ease you into some kind of synthville city, and track two starts with sounds reminiscent of a Parisian street at night. What I'm saying is beauty is in the eye of it's beholder so these songs are yours to interpret. If this album was a place, it'd be somewhere sunny with urban connotations. Where afros were expected and men wore floral print as a standard. The air would smell like ginger beer and women would get freaky. Every now and then though, you'd seem some synthin' robots go by with sythin' sexy robot women just to funk things up a bit. Synth city bitch. 

:BEERY METHOD:


Beery Method is the studio and Nick Beery is in the innkeeper. He creates some amazing images with use of graphic design, illustration and photography. He's done some amazing sets of artwork such as Hobo Eaters and Pop Fiction which is well-known animated characters turned sinful and seedy. Some are ghouls and ghosts from Beery's imagination and others are a mixture of famous images mixed with doom. My favorite sets are The Deathside, which is Beery's version of some popular  Star Wars with some added G and Raising Hell, which is a set of dead rappers who he's managed to make look even deader...
Check out his work here: www.beerymethod.com

Pop Culture

Ol Decay Bastard

ZombEazy

Big Puss

:RAISED BY WOLVES: PEGGS & SON: FREE STUFF:


New to Peggs and Son is Raised By Wolves and ooo boy they got some goodies. Check out the images and if you like what you see then check it out at the link below. You can buy from the store in Brighton if you want the whole shopping experience but of course you can buy online too. Peggs is one of the few places in the UK that you can get some of these labels, so if you got a taste for things a bit more than the average Joe and like your stuff to be looking the freshest then get with the program.



Oh and if your a bit short on the mula right now but your feeling the Raised By Wolves wear then Peggs and Son have just launched a new giveaway that ends in the 17th. All you got to do to win one of these hats below and some extras is go on the Peggs Facebook page and share and like this picture. You have nada to loose. Treats!



:AL RAZ ON FACEBOOK:

Chinese kitties be a' scheming...

Like my facebook page please?

:COMING SOON: FEEL YOU: CRYPT:

A still from the music video Feel You by Crypt coming soon, still.



:NEW JAY Z: $100 BILL: GREAT GATSBY SOUNDTRACK:


Here's the new tune $100 by Jay Z which tops off the first song of the soundtrack to The Great Gatsby. It's going to be a goodun. I've listened to the soundtrack on here and it sounds sooo good. Sounds like a mixture of hip hop, prohibition times and futuristic music. It;s equally great because you can see Jay Z hasn't just been picking his closest when putting together the soundtrack. Obviously baby moma's in it but there's a good few indie and British artists in there also.
Track listing below:




100$ Bill - JAY Z
 Back To Black - Beyoncé x André 3000 
Bang Bang - will.i.am 
A Little Party Never Killed Nobody - Fergie + Q Tip + GoonRock 
Young And Beautiful - Lana Del Rey 
 Love Is The Drug - Bryan Ferry with The Bryan Ferry Orchestra 
Over The Love - Florence + The Machine 
Where The Wind Blows - Coco O. of Quadron 
Crazy in Love - Emeli Sandé and The Bryan Ferry Orchestra
 Together – The xx 
Hearts A Mess - Gotye 
. Love Is Blindness – Jack White 
Into the Past - Nero 
Kill and Run - Sia

:NEW JANELLE MONAE FT. ERYKAH BADU: Q.U.E.E.N:


THE BOOTY DON'T LIE.
This a tune, haven't seen something like this since The Love Below album. 
Badu it's been a while but I forgive you.

:AL RAZ: QUEEN OF CONVERSATION:


I'm one of those people that when I'm having my hair cut I like to just keep quiet so the hairdresser can focus 100% on not fucking up my hair and less on celebrity weddings and my love life. 
I'm your female alternative to Mark from Peep Show, I like to think I just do a better job at hiding it. So today I went to a photo shoot. I had no pre-planned conversation topics and I was looking forward to someone touching my face in silence for a few hours and ending it with them giving me money leaving with a face of porceline/plaster. Not the case. The girl highlighted the fact I was being quiet so I felt obliged to make conversation...the only interesting thing I had learnt the day before.

"Did you know that guy Ken Barlow from Coronation Street who was recently outed as a rapist pedophile is 81? He doesn't look 81 at all, he looks really good for his age!."

Yep great well done, you are truly the master of pleasant conversation. Sorry make up lady but your decent conversation about make-up and what I do for a living is wasted on me, come back with facts on Pokemon and steak and I'll listen. But don't act like your not impressed by my fact.

:MAYBE IT'S MAYBELLINE: MAYBE IT'S NOT: MAYBE IT'S FUCK OFF:

I've started shooting more recently which means I've been having my make up done by professionals who actually know how to use it and don't pretend its war paint and make a complete coloring book of my face. Unfortunately the make ups been making me look better which means I've been spending major dollars keeping up appearances.

 I'm not alone. My mum is also a big fan of 'editing my looks' and has been taking me to many a chavy makeup artist to test shit out. (She has offered me a nose job twice now just sayin.) Today a lady told me how pretty and clean and smooth and amazing my skin was. Then all shit broke loose. She heard I didn't moisturise and lost her tiny make up mind. Now my skin was all of a sudden really dry and discolored and shit and needed a boost to hydrate it otherwise it would keel over and die; and the only way I could achieve this was by 
BUYING THI$ HYDRATING MAGIC CREAM FILLED WITH UNICORN JIZZ AND KITTEN WHI$PER$ AND ALL THIS OTHER SHIT FOR ONLY A TRILLION POUNDS...

So obviously we bought it.
 I'm gunna look fucking sick when that unicorn jizz sets in.

this is jokes